Here we are again
Standing at the edge
Balancing delicately on a wire that requires grace
But I have none, and am destined to fall
Into the void below.
The bleeding only helps for a moment
And I know I will always crave more
Which is why I eventually must stop the motion.
Otherwise it’d go on forever, one cut turning into a million
A few drops of blood turning into a river
Flowing freely out of its fleshy origin.
The thoughts that cloud my judgment also block the light
That they say is at the end of the tunnel.
I’m not so sure I believe in it anymore.
They also say there’s a light when you die
Well I guess that’s only for the good people
Because last time I tasted death it was pitch black.
Yet, still, I found that darkness more peaceful than the life I had been living.
Which brings us to where I am now,
With gashes on each arm and suicide on the brain
Even as I am begged to stay alive.
There is nothing quite like the bittersweet taste of your own tears
Mingled with the tears of the one you love.
It can make you question your plans
And revive hopes you thought you’d squashed.
Love is powerful, perhaps a bit too much
Because it keeps me here despite being dead inside.
Please, heart, let me go.
Let me be free of this agony.
Alas, I know you will keep me here until my love is gone.
Any less, I’d not expect.